I have been back from Ankara for almost nine months now, and my memories from Turkey are still vivid. I used to think the study abroad experience wasn’t a significant experience, but it truly is an unforgettable experience. It’s a bit difficult to summarize what happened in one blog entry, but I am certain future entries will be dedicated to my study abroad experience in Turkey.

Last week’s conversations with one of my dear friends from Turkey left me feeling very nostalgic. I can’t believe it was about a year ago that Erin, Zekiye, and I were saying goodbye to Ishraq. It seems like yesterday I sat defeating numerous people (mostly Erin and Ishraq hahaha…I love you guys!) in tavla (backgammon), playing Uno, drinking chay, and telling jinn stories in Ebi. I think the friends I made then are ones that I will never forget and ones with whom I will continue to keep in touch.

I met some amazing people who taught me so much. I also met some people with whom I didn't get along. I have a feeling culture shock took a toll on a lot of people, which might explain our behaviors. I don’t think I took this well either because prior to my departure from Stockton, I had a conflict with my friends. I talked about an issue face to face with some people who gave a most cruel, childish, and cold response and reaction. I don’t want to say I am confrontational, but I do like to try to get things out in the open. Of course, this has backfired on me, and I have realized that there are certain issues that are worth getting upset over. I am slowly learning how to control my emotions and not take everything personally. Thanks to those who have been patient and honest with me. Some of the best lessons were learned abroad from people who were honest and sincere…I hope and pray for good relations with everyone in my life and nothing but love in my heart for all.

I think one of the reasons why Erin and I miss Turkey so much is because of the people we met. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, but overall my experience was a positive one. It makes me realize that it’s not just about the destination, but who accompanies you to that destination. I know I can never live a life of solitude. I don’t think anyone can for that matter.

Peace and Love

Obama's Inaugural Speech

The inaugural speech deserves special attention...

Obama’s speech was phenomenal! His use of syntax, history, and delivery among everything else made this speech wonderful. People have been waiting for a speech like this for decades. Read it at: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090120/ap_on_go_pr_wh/inauguration_obama_text

I fell in love today...

I fell in love with hope again today...;)

I could not miss out on writing a blog today. Today, January 20, 2009, at noon, President Barack Hussein Obama took office. This indeed was a historic moment. Many people thought this could never happen in their lifetimes. In retrospect, I never even dreamed of this day.

I was fortunate to watch the inauguration ceremony live. It was 8:00am local time when my classmates and I trekked to the university center. To my delight, I found the Pub area backed with people eagerly awaiting the inauguration of the 44th president of the United States. Our new president! The atmosphere was very uplifting, and everyone was jovial. The atmosphere shifted to one of serenity when the oath taking began. Some even shed a few tears. It was truly moving and made me a little emotional, too. Our country truly has come a long way…At the same, however, many Americans like myself can’t help but remember the condition of our country over half a century ago.

Forty years ago Martin Luther King, Jr. was supposedly shot by James Earl Ray. Half a century ago Blacks were prohibited from sitting next to Whites in a restaurant, going to the same schools as Whites, and living a life of prosperity. It wasn’t uncommon for beatings and lynching to occur in some places. It’s undeniable that African-Americans have suffered and continue to suffer from the symptoms of a racist society. If you think about it, the era of segregation wasn’t too long ago. Those individuals who possessed such ideologies are still living and pass these ideologies on to the next generation. I grew up hearing the n-word and was also the target of blatant racism, but I am more hopeful than ever before.

Today, Barack Hussein Obama, the son of an African immigrant, stood on stage. Today, he was the one looking down at people, instead of others looking down on him. Today, he began the leadership so many dream of. This one man encompasses the hopes of entire nation and generation. My prayers and good wishes are with you, President Obama.

Random Thoughts of the Day

It’s my last semester of college, and I finally learned how to balance my life :P Too late! Better late than never…I guess. I should stay positive and always make room for changes and improvement. Unfortunately, I’ve kind of broken a part of my New Year’s Resolutions. Today, I reacted quite badly to an argument with my younger brother. From now on, I will just remove myself from situations that irk me. I also didn’t overreact or punch a hole in the wall when I got a rejection email from a national research conference. I submitted the abstract for my research paper last month, but I wasn’t confident sending in the draft because I only wrote it the day before it was due. I wish I had known about the deadline earlier, so I could have spent more time on research and writing. Although I feel disappointed, it is my fault for not working enough on it and checking the national deadline in advance. I am expecting another round of big news in about two weeks, so keep your fingers crossed…I’ll let you know what it is when I get the news ;)

I have been exercising regularly and pumping iron :P Oddly, I enjoy pumping iron more than cardio because I feel so strong and powerful…HAHAH..JK :P Weight loss is coming along. InshAllah, I hope it’s consist and long lasting. I primarily rely on food that I’ve cooked, which makes me feel good because I know what goes in the food and can control the amount of unhealthy ingredients. Today, I made vegetarian enchiladas stuffed with black beans, bell peppers, onions, Mexican squash, yogurt, and some cheese. I made the enchilada sauce myself with garlic, cumin, tomato sauce, oregano, and Serrano peppers. Not to sound pompous, but I thought they were delicious! Cooking is fun, and I am always experimenting in the kitchen. Feel free to post any recipes!

I don’t have a craving for meat anymore and can’t seem enjoy it anymore. I do enjoy tuna and salmon very much, so I don’t think I claim to be a vegetarian. I’ve considered becoming a vegetarian for health and ethical reasons and not because meat eating is wrong. Those who make the choice to stop eating it shouldn’t be ostracized and those who eat meat should also be treated with respect. I once told my mother I wanted to be vegetarian, so she went straight to the kitchen to make chapli kabab, a mouthwatering, Pakistani dish. I couldn’t resist and indulged in kabab eating. I used to blame my mom for failing at my vegetarianism, but it was really my fault. If I had wanted to become a vegetarian, I would have stuck with it. We’ll see how it goes…

Peace and Love :D

Monday was the first day of the Spring academic semester. I often came home feeling exhausted. Initially, I thought I was exhausted because I have early morning classes five days a week, and I’ve been spending more time outside of the house. This exhaustion isn’t necessarily due to my sleeping schedule, but may be explained by my mental health. Perhaps I am mentally and emotionally exhausted. I have too much on my mind right now, which means I have to do something to alleviate this stress. Writing this blog allows me to reflect and may alleviate some of my stress. I will, however, not write about every personal issue. Not everything should be disclosed in a blog. :)

So far, my classes are going well. Three of my classes are related to serious moral and contemporary issues. One of my theory classes is about animal issues, representation in literature, relationships with people, animal psychology, etc. The class I need to take in order to graduate is about ethical dilemmas, and another is called, “Torture and the Law.” Interesting stuff, right? I am pretty sure these “ethical dilemmas” will provoke a lot of thought and cause to me lose sleep :p. Anyway, I’ll wait until we have more lectures, discussions, and assignments to offer my opinions and share ideas.

On Thursday I was one of the two main panelists on a talk about our thoughts on the situations in Gaza. I was asked by the campus chaplain to share my views and opinions since I am one of the leaders of the Muslim Student Association. The president of Hillel (the Jewish student organization) was also asked to share her thoughts. I figured this wouldn’t be too hard since it seems like it’s more of an interfaith dialogue rather than a debate. When I went to the planning meeting, it looked like this “discussion” would turn into a debate. I made sure that I would be prepared before this event to defend my opinions and the truth. Despite reading a lot about this conflict, I am not an expert on this conflict! I made this clear to everyone before and during the event, but of course the audience members directed questions at us as if we were experts.

I have no negative feelings towards my fellow panelist, but I was appalled by everything she said on stage. I made sure to express these feelings but became emotional once (I didn’t lose any credibility, thankfully). She didn’t cite a source until an audience member demanded her to cite a source. I think she cited only two websites that sounded like they were unprofessional and pro-Israel. Prior to the panel, I made sure to research sources written by both sides. However, I ended up heavily relying on BBC because the average person knows BBC and its reputation. BBC provides good analysis and also gives historical information behind contemporary conflicts. Many people really don’t know or understand how this conflict came about. The only thing related to this conflict we learned about in high school was the Holocaust. Some students, if their universities offer such courses, learn about the conflict in university classes. Some audience members sounded completely ignorant when they offered comments or asked questions, which means that we all have a lot left to learn. If you take a side, make sure that there is a rational reason for why you taking a side. Someone said, “Israel doesn’t lie because it’s a democracy.” I had a “what the heck?!” reaction in my mind and in the rebuttal. Anyway, I could go on and on. There is a genuine humanitarian crisis in Gaza. I hope and pray that the suffering of these people ends immediately, and they will soon live in peace and prosperity. Ameen.

I have so much more to say about this issue (don’t we all?), but I will save it for future posts :)

Peace and Love :)

The 10th of Muharram

I am still trying to get the hang of this whole blogging thing. I am hoping I'll get the hang of it soon and find an appropriate style.

My days of vacation are dwindling, and I realize how fast time is flying. I’ll be starting the last Spring semester of my undergraduate career in four days, inshallah. (The plan is to graduate this May…Of course, my destiny may change in the next few months, so I am hoping for the best.) I can’t help but feel a little emotional and nervous. It makes me realize how fast I am growing up! :P

Although I wish I had done something exciting for break, I am glad I had a chance to relax and catch up on life. Winter vacation also gave me the opportunity to fast for the first 10 days of Muharram, the first month in the Islamic calendar. Yesterday was the 10th of Muharram and the day of Ashura. The significance of Ashura is different for Sunni and Shia Muslims. Shias mourn the death of Prophet Muhammad’s grandson, Hussain ibn Ali, who was martyred at the Battle of Karbala. The Battle of Karbala consolidated the power and position of the Umayyad dynasty, which was led by Yazid I at the time (Islamic history can be a bit complicated). Thus, Shias commemorate this day as a day of mourning. Sunnis, on the other hand, observe the 10th of Muharram differently. According to Sunni sources, the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) encouraged his followers to fast on this day when he found the Jews of Medina fasting on this day. The Jews fasted on this day because it was on this day that Prophet Moses fasted as a sign of gratitude to God for saving the Israelites in Egypt. Muslims view Prophet Moses (Musa) as a great prophetic figure because he is often mentioned in the Qur’an. I’ve also read that the 10th of Muharram the day when Prophet Noah left his ark after the great flood.

I fasted on this day as a sign of devotion to Allah, and because I come from a Sunni family. I have a problem with the label Sunni and Shia, but I claim Sunni because my family and religious practices reflect the attitudes of “Sunni Islam.” These labels are human constructions that need to be deconstructed. I hope to expand my knowledge about Islam and improve my faith, so I may become more in touch with a strong Islamic identity. Anyway, the 10th of Muharram is a day of contention between Shia and Sunni Muslims, a rivalry that has contributed to major problems in Islamic societies. The schism in Islam occurred shortly after the Prophet Muhammad’s death when Ali did not become caliph, or spiritual ruler of the Islamic community. This great schism has led to bloody battles and conflicts in Islamic societies that continue into the 21st century. This is what often makes me emotional and frustrated. Maybe if this schism didn’t exist, a good number of problems in the Muslim world would disappear. Sometimes, I can’t fathom why and how this conflict has become this way. How can people brutally murder each other? Why is there such strong hate and distrust between these two groups? Conflicts like these reflect the worst aspect of human nature. When you study the roots of these problems, power is often the primary issue behind these conflicts. The struggle for power tends to result in despicable acts. Is it because religion is so personal that it affects other aspects of life? Personal beliefs also cause many of us to judge others because we believe our ideologies and beliefs are better than the rest. I’ll be honest, I think people who argue about the rightful successor of the Prophet (SAW) are petty. The caliphs of Islam are very important, but what progress will we make if we argue who should have succeeded the Prophet in the 7th century when we are living in the 21st century. We have our own problems that need to be addressed. History is important because it can teach us a lesson, but it seems in this case that it is only a source of contention. I pray and hope that Muslims will come together and all our problems will end, inshallah. May 2009 be a better world for everyone…

Muslim Marriage Crisis?

My father showed me an article in the local newspaper a little while ago (Is he trying to tell me something? :/) Apparently, the article had been published previously in another 209 newspaper. Here is the link from the Modesto Bee about a Muslim matrimonial service written by Jennifer Garza of the Sacramento Bee. http://www.modbee.com/life/faithvalues/story/531576.html. I also recently read a blog article by Shabana Mir about single, Muslim females in the US. Here is the link for her blog: http://koonjblog.wordpress.com/2008/07/30/single-muslim-and-female-a-gendered-forecast-of-the-american-muslim-community/

The articles are an easy read and well worth the time. I'll dedicate one of my blogs to this subject sometime in the near future. Happy reading!

Peace <3

Life is Too Short

So much is going on in the world these days. I could have written about Gaza, the economic crisis, the Mumbai attacks, and a myriad of other world events. Since it doesn’t look like those situations will change anytime soon, I have time to reflect as these events continue to unravel. These events and events in my personal life have been causing me to lose some sleep lately. A childhood friend of my elder brother recently died (May God grant him heaven). I interacted with him from time to time with him at the mosque as a child. Out of everyone at the mosque, we knew he would be the one most likely to succeed. Mashallah, he was ambitious, smart, and religious. His family was also respectable. They were one of the most kindhearted families I had ever met, mashallah. He was their only son, and I hope Allah gives them patience during this difficult time. He was a last year medical student. I am sure he had so much planned and would have had a successful career. He was about 26/27 years old, which means he hadn’t wasted anytime, and may have actually been ahead of his peers in medical school. All I can say is that he died in an accident, but he died an honorable death because people had nothing but good things to say about him. He wasn’t known for having any vices but was known for noble deeds.

When I think of myself, I can’t help but feel a little shame. Alhamdulilah, God has blessed me with so much, yet I complain about the little things in life. If I die today, how will I be remembered? Forget being remembered, what will I have accomplished in the eyes of God? There have been times, God forgive me, when I haven’t made the effort to pray. How many mornings have I slept in and wasted time? What if I hurt someone’s feelings and couldn’t make amends with them because I died? God is the most Merciful, most Just, and most Forgiving. However, God can’t forgive me if hurt the feelings of another person. Essentially, the person whom I hurt must forgive me. This life is a test, and I will be judged on the actions in this life along with the way I interact with my fellow human beings.

Something else that will forever be etched on my conscious is another death of a childhood and high school friend. As children, we were close in a sense that we played and fought and did things children usually do. As we grew older, our Pakistani culture dictated that we could no longer openly interact with one another. We had a class in high school and chit chatted once a in while. Mashallah, He was also very smart and was planning on becoming a civil engineer. Anyway, we were meant to see each other again when we enrolled at the same university. Unfortunately, we never acknowledged each other. I always avoided eye contact or took another path if I saw him from afar. We bumped into each other one day, but nothing was said and we moved on. Shortly after the incident, he died on his 20th birthday. I not only mourned his death, but I also cried because I avoided him.

For some of you, this all may seem irrelevant, but the moral of the story is to make the most of each day. Don’t go to bed angry with anyone. LOL My younger brother taught me that when he would say he forgave me after we had just had an argument lol. (He likes to think it was my fault, but I think otherwise!) I don’t have the best relations right now with some members of my family or friends, but those relationships, I hope, will be salvaged soon. If you can’t make amends, at least try. If that doesn’t work, you can say you tried! Muslims believe we have a life after death. Whatever we do in this life, we will have to live with it in the next life. Muslims also believe that we all will go to Heaven, which is true to an extent. Islam is a religion of justice, so regardless of the final destination, if we were horrible people, we will still have to suffer some sort of punishment.

I’ll leave you with a more positive note-

“O mankind! We created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that ye may know each other (not that ye may despise (each other). Verily the most honored of you in the sight of Allah is (he who is) the most righteous of you. And Allah has full knowledge and is well acquainted (with all things).” (Qur’an 49:13)

My First Blog Post! :D

I finally took the initiative and made a blog. I was supposed to have created one prior to my departure for Turkey in August 2007. My friends and I agreed it would be most suitable to stay in touch by reading each other’s blogs. I agreed wholeheartedly, but obviously this is my first post lol. Lets just say that the beginning of 2009 is the beginning of many things. This blog, like the title suggests, will be about anything and everything. So some posts will be profound and others will be frivolous :D. Although I have been back from Turkey for about seven months, it was an unforgettable experience that I will write about from time to time. I’ll also write about my interests, things I’ve been reading, and so on. Since it is the second day of 2009, I will dedicate this post to the New Year :D!

I have even made New Year’s Resolutions, something I’ve never done before. Supposedly, one must write one’s resolutions in order for them to be considered official.

1. Anger Management-LOL. Sounds funny, no? When I think of “Anger Management,” I think of a man who punches holes in the walls and screams at anyone for anything. Fortunately, I can’t punch holes in the wall, (I am not that strong lol) and I don’t scream at anyone. In fact, I don’t have the vocal capacity to scream. I think if you heard me scream, you would probably laugh. I am not violent, but I do have a temper sometimes. To put it quite simply, I gotta let go of the little things. A friend of mine, Allah bless her, sent me this lecture by Husain Abdul Sattar. http://www.halaltube.com/controlling-anger. It’s about 31 minutes in length, but it’s a 31 minutes worth spending if you also have issues with anger. Anger is an emotion that everyone experiences differently. Our patience level is also reflective of our capacity to express anger. If we practice more patience, many of the problems in our lives will disappear. I am not preaching to anyone, believe me, this is more for myself. However, I believe we can all help each other in these matters.

2. Lose Some Weight-Something quite obvious lol. I don’t want to dwell on this issue too much, but it is an important issue that might get addressed if I openly confront it. I put on the weight over the years due to an illness. I am thankful to Allah (God) for helping me through it. Now that I am a lot healthier, I can take control of this weight. I’ve been going to the gym regularly, walking more, and have been trying to eliminate bad foods. Portion control is also vital in weight loss. I eat less when I sit down and savor my meals than I would if I were eating in a hurry. Because of my busy schedule, I usually wouldn’t make time for a meal. I now realize the importance of sitting down and enjoying a meal. These efforts have paid off, and I am doing well. I have a way to go, but with patience and hard work, I hope to be successful. Please pray for my success in this endeavor. My God bless us all with good health.

3. Make More Time for Allah (SWT)-If you haven’t noticed, I am Muslim. Don’t mind the “Muslim slang” here and there ;). I would like to increase the amount of time I spend in worship, which means regular prayers and Qu’ran recitation.

4. Improve Relations with Family and Friends-Family and friends are very important to me. My mom said something the other day that I will never forget. She said that if God had willed it, human beings could have been born from trees, in a cabbage patch, or wherever lol. Instead, most babies are born after having been in the womb of their mothers for nine months. Pregnancy is not easy, either. We are born like this so that we may have compassion for each other and recognize familial relationships. I hope that my relationships with family and friends improve as I improve my patience as well. Everything connects! Friendship also provides love and companionship. I don’t think it’s possible to go through life without love and friendship.


5. Learn How to Listen More and Speak Less-If I listen more, I’ll probably learn more and not miss out on a lot. Also, a friend of mine once said, “Brevity is the soul of wisdom.” I think that’s how the quote goes. Anyway, sometimes people, like me, can talk and talk, but is what we say relevant? Talking less will also require patience and self-control ;)

6. Be More Organized-Life would be easier my room would be more organized. I find myself cleaning a lot, but five minutes later, my room seems to transform again. I think my problem is that I like keeping everything. The other day, I got rid of two boxes worth of stuff, and it felt like my room lost 30 pounds ;). I’ve heard that organization contributes to less stress.

7. Time Management-Nothing much to say, but the MSN and Facebook also gotta go! Ok, not go, but should be taken in moderation. I’ve been doing a better job lately. Lets hope it works, God willing! If I manage my time better, I can be doing more productive things. I also find this blog is a better use of my time than MSN. It’s a different form of expression where I can keep in touch with friends and learn new things.

I guess that’s it for now, kids. Inshallah (God willing), I hope to write regular posts. Please feel free to contact me, leave comments, post articles, advice, etc. I hope 2009 is a better year for the world. May we all be blessed with happiness, good health, success, and strong faith in God. I’ll leave you with this quote by Ben Franklin- “Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each New Year find you a better man.”